GUARDING YOUR HEART by Ummu Raihanah, Sydney

By Ummu Raihanah, Sydney

It is better for a woman not too much open her eyes and her heart on her close friend’s life or her sister’s life who lives better than her. Because it would make her became kufur nima ( ignorance, Islam or the teaching of Islam are denied) of Allah’s blessing against all the gifts that Allah has bestowed on her hand or in front of her.

To be a servant who is grateful is not easy Allah says:

وقليل من عبادى ٱلشكور

And very few of My servants are grateful. (Saba '- 34:13)

Thus, be wise to guard the view of your heart so your heart will be guarded and the gratitude and steadfastness will be maintained

TO WHOM WILL YOU MARRY YOUR DAUGHTER TO ??

TO WHOM WILL YOU MARRY YOUR DAUGHTER TO ?

If you are a father who has a beautiful girl, smart, and noble character, to whom will you marry your daughter to?

Of course you will say: I will marry my daughter with a handsome young man, educated, has a series of titles, rich, income above the average, in order to ensure her life, and their offspring.

Is there any father who is more concerned with the "future" of his daughter in the hereafter, and marrying his daughter to a young man who is at a glance just like “an ordinary person”, but  his is the one whose religion and attitude (akhlaq) you are satisfied (Ridha) with ?

Who is that kind of father?

Heis Sa'id ibn al-Musayyib Al-Makhzuumii Al-Qurasyii, which used to be called by Abu Muhammad (born 13 H = 634 M - died 94 H = 713 M).

He is the Headman of the Taabi'iin (those who seen the Companions of the Messenger of Allaah sallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam), the leader of seven Fuqahaa ( Fiqh Expert) in Medina during that time.

How is the figure of Sa'id ibn al-Musayyib as an ideal Father in-law?

Here's the story as told by his son in law : Katsiir bin Al-Muthallib bin Abi Wadaa'ah ...

***

From Ibn Abi Wada'ah, which is Katsiir- , he said:

Long ago, I studied at the majlis Sa'id ibn al-Musayyib.

One time he did not see me for a few days, so when I came to him, he asked me: "Where have you been all this time?"

I replied: "My wife died, so I was busy for that."

He said: "Why didn’t you inform us so that we could come to her funeral ?"

Then he asked: "Have you remarried?”

I replied: "May God love you, who wants to marry his daughter to me, while I do not have a property except only two or three dirhams?"

He said: "I (would marry my daughter to you)."

I asked: "Are you going to do that ?"

He replied: "Yes."

Then he praised Allah and shalawat (ask Allah to send blessing on ) to the Prophet sallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam, then he married his daughter to me with the dowry (mahar ) of  two or three dirhams, then I was just standing and do not know what to do because I was too excited.

As  I walked back to my house, while I was thinking where should I get a loan from ?, I stop by at the mosque to pray Magrib then I continued back home.

At that time I was alone and I was fasting, so I broke the fast by eating dry bread and oil.

I heard the sound of knocking on my door, I asked: "Who is it ?"

He said: "Sa'id."

Then I try to remember all the people by the name of  Sa'id except Sa'eed ibn al-Musayyib (in-laws), because he has not been seen for forty years except between his home and mosque.

So I came out, and it was actually Sa'id ibn al-Musayyib (in-law), and I thought that now he would have known my condition.

I said: "O Abu Muhammad (the nickname of my in-law), why did not you send someone for me to come to you?"

He said: "No, you have more right to be visited, as before you were single then you married, so I don’t want you to sleep alone tonight, here is your wife!"

Apparently my wife was standing behind her father's height.

So my in-law held his daughter’s hand (which has now became my wife), and then pushed her to the door (so that she entered my house), then my in law closed the door (and left us both), and my wife fell because she was too shy, then I locked the door. Then I put the plate on my hand in the shadow of the oil lamp so that she won’t see it.

I climbed to the roof outside my house and I called the neighbours, they came to me and asked: "What's was going on with you?" then I told them (about our marriage), then they went to see my wife.

The news of my marriage was heard by my mother, and she came and said to me: "My face is haram (forbidden) to your face (means that I'm not your mother) if you touch your wife before I dressed her up for three days. Then my mother dressed her up for three days, then I started interact with her just like husband and wife .

Actually my wife is the most beautiful woman of all women, she was the most memorized of Qur'an, the most understand of Sunnah of the Prophet sallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam, and she was the most knowing about the rights of the husband.

For a whole month I did not come to visit Sa'id ibn al-Musayyib (in-laws).

Then I went to his Majlis (gatherings for religious learning), I said salam and he replied my salam,  but he did not talk to me until the majlis empty  .

When there was no one left at the majlis except me, he asked: "What's the news about her ?" (he meant was his daughter who was none other than my wife).

I replied: "Fine, O Abu Muhammad,she was in a state that is loved by her friends and hated by the enemy."

He advised: "If she nuisances to you and bothers your mind, then (beat her) with a stick."

So I went to my house, then he (in-laws) gave me with twenty thousand dirhams (for the provision).

***

Do you know ...

That before Sa'id ibn al-Musayyib marrying his daughter to Katsiir Ibn Abi Wada'ah, Caliph Abdul Malik bin Marwan has come to Sa'id to make a proposal for his daughter  for Al-Walid’s son, a son of the heir to the royal crown?

What did Sa'id does ?

Sa'id rejected  the proposal of the Caliph, and in many ways, the Caliph try hard for his desire to be accomplished, but Sa'id consistent  to his decision, the Caliph became angry and whipped Sa'id with one hundred lashes was  in winter season where bone-chilling cold, and Sa'id watered with a crock of cold water, and he was dressed with only a piece of woollen cloth.

(From the book "An A'laam Siyar-Nubalaa", Al-Imam Adh-Dzahabii, vol.4 page.233-234, published.Daar Ar-Risaalah).

O the Fathers ...

Remember that good looks will fade, all the attributes of the world will be lost, and there will not be a lasting treasure ...

Prophet sallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam said to the fathers :

"إذا جاءكم من ترضون دينه وخلقه فأنكحوه, إلا تفعلوا تكن فتنة في الأرض وفساد عريض." (رواه الترمذي وقال: حسن)

" If there comes to you one with whose religion and attitude you are satisfied, then give your daughter to him in marriage, for if you do not do so, surely there will be fitnah (test) on earth and will become widespread on earth." (HR. At-Tirmidhi, he said: hasan hadeeth).

May Allah grant all of us a Saleeh (righteous person)  In-laws like Sa'id ibn Salih al-Musayyib- to the young Muslims,

Da'wah group

AUROT

AMONG THE NEGATIVE EFFECTS OF WOMEN PUT HER FACE PICTURES ON 

THE INTERNET:

- It would make a man intentionally or not who sees it becomes tempted, even creating stains in his heart, make him fantasize (thinking) day and night, and even worse as could cause bad intentions or even commit a crime

Although a woman covers the entire body except the face and palms of her hands, then she shows herself in social media then this also cannot guarantee would save the people whose seen it from fitnah (causing problems between people/attempt to create chaotic situation that tests one’s faith), because woman's face has a very strong attraction to men, so that, even if the entire body covered properly, but if her face is showed and displayed in front of the visitors of the account, then it could cause a scandal at the heart of the beholder.

Caused by people who witnessed the photo could be scandalize then  women should not put their face images on pages that can be accessed by the men who is not her mahrom (someone who you can marry, someone who you should cover yourself)

- Teasing a man, makes him to not lower his gaze, whereas in the Qur'an ordered to gaze.  In the real life, man has not dare to take a long time staring at women, especially with the one he doesn’t know yet.  Men seem to be embarrassed if they caught when they was looking at the woman constantly.

But with the photos on the internet, give a chance to men to see it as long as they want without feeling ashamed, because no one would notice them.  And it could bring some of negative effects for both men and women. Therefore women should help the men by preventing this to happen, such as not to display their pictures.

How many women who are victims of a bad man started from Facebook, were invited to meet, deceived, kidnapped, raped, killed, etc., begins with the man interested in seeing her photo on FB, as is often reported by the media.

- Your photos can be copied and edited by bad people, turned into pornographic images, or used for other things that harm you, (for example, they make an account by using your photograph )

There is a question for Muslim women who display a picture on the internet, Who do you display the photos for ?

Allaah Subhana Wa Ta’ala has ordered muslim and muslimah to protect their eyes from the opposite sex who is not mahram. Not only that, Allaah also ordered to all of them to look after each other.

When uploading your photos on the internet then you indirectly have "signed the contract" that you liberate anyone to be free to look at you without exception. So where is your protection against your honorary and others?

O women ... do you know that:

(1) The more stares of men who are tempted to you (if in purpose shows the beauty / beauty of the body and appear tempting) then will increase your sins more

(2) the more men imagine about you .... the more passionate they become for you then the more your sins will increase too…

(3) Don’t you think the smile that you share carelessly,  will not be accountable in the future .. !!!.

 It  could be your smile,  instantly become the fantasy of a man who is not lawful to you (not halal) for days and days.., especially the beauty of your body ....

(4) If you protect your beauty and the elegance of your body only for your husband ... then you will be more beautiful and more elegant  in Allaah’s Paradise ...,

(5) However, if you let the beauty and the elegant spread out,  then remember that all of that will be gone and will melt in the grave and becomes the food of  worms and caterpillars ...

And in the hereafter ... it could be turned into the fuel of Hell fire !!

Nabicity 26/04/1436H

DO NOT BE JEALOUS WHEN YOUR HUSBAND IS DEVOTED TO HIS MOTHER

Question:

Sheikh I have a wife who is jealous if she saw me spend my money to my mother and bought her what she needs ... then what should I do ???

Sheikh hafidzohullah answered:

Your wife wants to be jealous, wants to die, and wants to live, do not you worry, even though  her jealousy goes through the sky.  It should not be affected to you, because devotion  to your mother is obligatory (wajib) for you. 

It is your mother’s right ..

Your wife wants to block you  from your devotion towards  your mother ???

Who is she ???

She wants to prevent  you from your mother , who loves you, tired of carried you in her womb and even she was suffered when she delivered you. 

Who is able to compete with a mother’s sacrifice her child ??

This is a lame wife, why would she  be that jealous of the child who wants to be devoted  to his mother ???

Even some scholars say this is an insane and it is not jealousy anymore ..

There is a jealousy and there is madness.

But what this wife did is worse and the lowest act.

The rights of a mother is very massive ..

And as a wife she should be devoted to God, and she should know that the happiness of her husband in the world and the hereafter is in the devotion to his mother ..

And if the wife tries to prevent the husband from being  devoted then she should be careful to Allah’s threat .

This is a battle that’s  blown by satan to ruin a servant  of Allah who is obedient and devoted to his mother), that is the wife who controls her husband….

On the other hand, there are some of husbands that jealous to his wife when she tries to devoted to her father or mother, too …

That all is tricks of satan ... This is insane and not jealousy ..

And a mukmin ( a believer ) should fear Allah and he / she  should know  the Mother’s rights are massive  ... and use this opportunity when the mother is still alive before you cry over her departure (dies)..

Ignore your wife, your friends or your close friends when they try to prevent your devotion to your Mother…

It is worth noticing that your current position now is all there for the reasons because of your Mother has been looking after you and taking care of you…., before you cry over her departure (dies) because your devotion to her is not enough (deficient) ...

The Prophet said:

الزم رجلها

"Remain constantly at her feet (always devoted to her)"

It is not enough for you only fulfil her needs, but try to always close to her, and giving your devotion to her , Allahu Akbar ....

You know the heaven that the saheed (warriors) had to sacrifice their lives to achieve it, then heaven is also achieved by your mother’s feet "

Subhanallah ... ilzam sentence rijlaha (remain constantly at her feet)

if you look  closely and think this sentence then you will wonder …...

The Prophet did not say to be devoted to your mother, or fulfil your mother’s needs.. but it’s more than that….   which is for you to always be on her side and your devotion to her…

A young man who came from Yemen said to the Prophet:

"O Messenger of Allah, I migrated from Yemen to Medina (the city) to ba'iat (pledging spiritual allegiance) to you, convert to Islam and struggle together with you ...

The Prophet said: Is your mother still alive,

And he said: Yes O Messenger of Allah ...

The Prophet said: Remain constantly at her feet ... "

Do we know what is the word of “remain constantly at her feet ????”

It shows a greatest loyalty act…

We all know that the feet is located at the bottom, so remain at her feet is a form of submissiveness and obedient to our parents ...

Islam is the religion of the mighty ... but related to devotion to our parents, therefore we should show our humbleness to our parents ..

Not only in the Koran, but in the hadith (Sunnah) of  the Prophet explained this issue ...

واخفض لهما جناح الذل

Allah mentions the word “dzull” (low)

And in Sunnah also mentioned

الزم رجلها

(remain constantly at her feet)

Remain at her feet, for that is where your Paradise lies…

Actually  you're in heaven now,  you're  in happiness  when  your mother's heart is generous, sincere and happy  upon you ...

As long as your mother is still alive then achieve it and do not waste it.

Before tears of regret come to you ....

Close all the tongues off from trying to stop you to be devoted to your mother ...

Cover your ears when someone trying to stop you to be devoted to your mother ...

Tell your wives from her first day with you "do not you dare to speak  if I want to devote myself to my mother,,, do not you ever stop me to be devoted  to my mother ..."

It is your obligation and it is your mother’s right ... do you know what  is your mother’s right to you ????

Although you do everything for her but still you will not be able to pay back what your mother has struggle to you….

For someone who’s seen it from the Qur’an and Sunnah then he would see that the rights of the mother is mentioned so much.

Yes ... we know that the wife also has right to you ... but there is more right than simply only rights ...

If your mother wants you to go to work and your wife said: "What is this you are always out, I have never be able to sit relax with you ...

So tell your wife: "Sshh, Keep quite ! ... This is my mother, my heaven and my hell ... so do not comment anything about my parents ..."

At that moment you have to make your wife quite  ... do not let your wife or your friends  get involve between you and your mother ...

So when there are words come out from your wife or your friends that protest when you want to be devoted to your mother,  at the same time stop them all .... ... tell them that they may comment anything  but not about your mother ...

I willed myself and all of you to fear Allah and specially to this woman to fear Allah ...

A wife should treat her mother inlaw as she treat her own mother… She should be devoted to her, respect her and honor her…

These are the character of Saleha Women ( Pious Women). The wife that saleha would struggle to be devoted to her husband and supports her husband’s devotion to his mother…

Saleha women should wake her husband to be devoted to his mother ...

Saleha wife should invite him to be devoted to his mother even he was in relaxing...

When her husband came home and he was tired, then saleha wife would say: "blessed you,  my husband verily you had just returned from heaven ... if you meet the needs of your mother's right then God would meet our needs also ..."

Because the blessing of devoting child to his parents would make God gives blessings to his life..either his wealth , his children, his deeds and so on ...

Saleha wife should reinforce her husband when he is weak to be devoted to his mother ...

Be aware for you not to follow the lame wife like that ... That was insane and not jealousy  ... do not let your love to your wife beat your love to your mother ...

May God give taufiq (able to success given by Allah) and hidayah (guidance) to us all Amiiin ....

Nabicity26/4/1436H

Translation of some of the recording from questions and answer by Sheikh Muhammad bin Mukhtar al-syinqithi -hafidzohullah ta'ala-

"PREVENTION IS BETTER THAN CURE”, And Preventing Zina Starts From Lowering The Gaze

The eyes have desires that have a great tendency to want to be fulfilled, as if there is a gravity-like force that pulls the sight to the things we should not be looking at. Like gravity, those who resist will feel the force acting on them, while those who just go with the flow will feel little or nothing at all. Like gravity, it takes a lot of strength to escape it.

One of the desires of the eyes is the sexual desire. Some follow this desire willingly, some struggle to keep the gaze down, and others are somewhere in between. If this desire is not kept in check, it can affect our productivity. Looking at what we should not distracts us, and when we are distracted, we stray away from our focus and lose much of our precious time on useless things.

“Tell the believing men to reduce [some] of their vision and guard their private parts. That is purer for them. Indeed, Allah is Acquainted with what they do. And tell the believing women to reduce [some] of their vision and guard their private parts…” [Qur’an: Chapter 24, Verses 30-31].

Not only does the Qur’an make a connection between the gaze and sexual desires, it does so explicitly by specifying the physical area of the body associated with sexual desires: the private parts. The explicit nature of the verse should catch our attention. It should also make us realize the seriousness of the issue, considering that the ultimate sin of the private parts is zina (fornication).

It is incredible to realize that something as serious as zina can start from something as simple as a gaze! The path to zina can be short or long. For some, Shaytan may slowly whisper for years and years before the individual falls into the trap of zina. Shaytan is relentless and he is patient. Whatever small opportunity he sees, he will take it, as long as it leads us closer to zina.

The danger is that we might be oblivious to all the more reason why we should cultivate the awareness of Allah  in ourselves. Those who are most aware of Allah  (those who have more taqwa) are those who are hardest for Shaytan to lead astray. And in this context, it makes perfect sense that more taqwa leads to the protection from Shaytan. This is the reason why Allah  prohibits not only zina itself, but anything that leads to it, as He  says:

“And do not approach unlawful sexual intercourse. Indeed, it is ever an immorality and is evil as a way” [Qur’an: Chapter 17, Verse 32].

www.productivemuslim.com

SAY NO TO VALENTINES DAY

Qur'an Surah 2:120

And never will the Jews or the Christians approve of you until you follow their religion. Say, "Indeed, the guidance of Allah is the [only] guidance." If you were to follow their desires after what has come to you of knowledge, you would have against Allah no protector or helper.

What is the ruling on Valentine’s Day?

Praise be to Allaah.

Firstly:

Valentine’s Day is a jaahili Roman festival, which continued to be celebrated until after the Romans became Christian. This festival became connected with the saint known as Valentine who was sentenced to death on 14 February 270 CE. The kuffaar still celebrate this festival, during which immorality and evil are practised widely. 

Secondly:

It is not permissible for a Muslim to celebrate any of the festivals of the kuffaar, because festivals come under the heading of shar’i issues which are to be based on the sound texts.

Shaykh al-Islam Ibn Taymiyah (may Allaah have mercy on him) said: Festivals are part of sharee’ah, clear way and rituals of which Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

“To each among you, We have prescribed a law and a clear way” [al-Maa’idah 5:48]

“For every nation We have ordained religious ceremonies which they must follow” [al-Hajj 22:67]

To conclude: 

The Mulsims should not do any of their rituals at the time of their festivals; rather the day of their festival should be like any other day for the Muslims. The Muslims should not do anything specific in imitation of them. End quote from Majmoo al-Fataawa (25/329).

Al-Haafiz al-Dhahabi (may Allaah have mercy on him) said: If the Christians have a festival, and the Jews have a festival, it is only for them, so no Muslim should join them in that, just as no Muslim should join them in their religion or their direction of prayer. End quote from Tashabbuh al-Khasees bi Ahl al-Khamees, published in Majallat al-Hikmah (4/193)

The hadeeth to which Shaykh al-Islam Ibn Taymiyah referred was narrated by al-Bukhaari (952) and Muslim (892) from ‘Aa’ishah (may Allaah be pleased with her) who said: Abu Bakr came in and there were two young girls of the Ansaar with me who were singing about what had happened to the Ansaar on the day of Bu’aath. She said: And they were not (professional) singing girls. Abu Bakr said: “Musical instruments of the shaytaan in the house of the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him)?!” and that was on the day of Eid. The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “O Abu Bakr, every people has a festival and this is our festival.”

Abu Dawood (1134) narrated that Anas (may Allaah be pleased with him) said: When the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) came to Madeenah, they had two days when they would play. He said: “What are these two days?” They said: “We used to play on these days during the Jaahiliyyah.” The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Allaah has given you instead of them two days that are better than them: the day of al-Adha and the day of al-Fitr.” This hadeeth was classed as saheeh by al-Albaani in Saheeh Abi Dawood.

This indicates that festivals are among the characteristics by which nations are distinguished, and it is not permissible to celebrate the festivals of the ignorant and the mushrikeen (polytheists).

The scholars have issued fatwas stating that it is haraam to celebrate Valentine’s Day.

Shaykh Ibn ‘Uthaymeen (may Allaah have mercy on him) was asked:

In recent times the celebration of Valentine’s Day has become widespread, especially among female students. It is a Christian festival where people dress completely in red, including clothes and shoes, and they exchange red flowers. We hope that you can explain the ruling on celebrating this festival, and what your advice is to Muslims with regard to such matters; may Allaah bless you and take care of you.

 He replied:

Celebrating Valentine’s Day is not permissible for a number of reasons.

·         It is an innovated festival for which there is no basis in Islam.

·         It promotes love and infatuation.

·         It calls for hearts to be preoccupied with foolish matters that are contrary to the way of the righteous salaf (may Allaah be pleased with them).

It is not permissible on this day to do any of the things that are characteristic of this festival, whether that has to do with food, drinks, clothing, exchanging gifts or anything else.

The Muslim should be proud of his religion and should not be a weak character who follows every Tom, Dick and Harry. I ask Allaah to protect the Muslims from all temptations, visible and invisible, and to protect us and guide us.

End quote from Majmoo’ Fataawa al-Shaykh Ibn ‘Uthaymeen (16/199)

Courtesy: Islam Q&A