In the last session of “Surah Annur, tafsir” lessons, our beloved teacher, doctoral Ali Gozi Tuwijiri, one of the biggest lecturer of Tafsir in Medinah, had told us :
"the story of a girl who got trap in the worldly life and away from religion, and her father married her off to a man who pious and faithful".
No other purpose from her father except to give her a husband who would be able direct her to Allah’s heaven also teach and educate her correct Islamic guidance.
When we see from the story that in fact first, his daughter refused for the reason that she has no love to this man, but she wanted to marry the man on her dream just like most the man of these days.
She refused it because she just wants to be free as a girl in general . Her refusal because she is worry about this true religion.
So in the Islamic Shari'a, A father may force his daughter to marry a man if he sees there is benefit for her deen reasons (maslahat diiniyah).
And if there is a big advantage from it, which is giving dakwah to his daughter by having a pious husband.
As for the basic of this law is not allowed to force a child, but disallowance by the prophet is if there are no benefit behind it.
It's when the father did not force his daughter to marry a good person and then eventually she marries the one she likes (just like most girls in these days), then the live of this girl become fall apart and far away from the deen (religion) then the father will be held the responsibility state of the girls was messier and more distant from the religious life,
then the father will be held responsible in front of Allaah.
The original Legal of marriage is the parents is the one who choose a partner to his children.
Because in the hadith says.
إذا جاءكم من ترضون دينه وخلقه فانكحوه
"When it comes to you the person you ridho ( the fact of being pleased or approved ) with his religion and then marry them with your children”
We refer to the instructions of our Prophet is the value of good and bad of religion was handed over to her father.
So the Prophet said:
إذا جاءكم
(When it comes to you / parents)
and not
إذا جاءك
(When it comes to you, O woman)
The benefit to the above message is when the daughter married to a pious man, it is expected that the changes of her is become more devoted as many come to pass and it happened that the wife to follow the religion of her husband ...
As someone that follows the religion of his best friend (as already referred to in the hadith)
Isn’t that the husband is the best friend to death ??????
Isn’t that the husband has greater influence to his wife ....
الرجل على دين خليله، فلينظر أحدكم من يخالل
" A person is likely to follow the religion of his friend, so look whom you be friend. "
So this big mashalat (benefit) should be taken first, if the child is not married to the soleh (pios) person and even married to the one she likes which far away from religion then the child will be further away from the religion of Allah.
This is a very large mudhorot (harm) .
In the rules of our religion is addhororu yuzaal (damage should be removed)
As for the people in these era that most fasaad / damage in the world is where the haram relationship (going out as boyfriend and girlfriend) uninhibited,
Where the Shari'ah that actually protect the honor of women (the father choose a good person for his daughter) now this guidance is become vanish.
Because if the child having “a date” then falls in love with the wrong person then she would reject a good person who would come to her with the reasons that she has no love ...that’s it. ...
We all know that “dating (boyfriend/girlfriend relationship) is clearly Haram in this religion....
Either would like to mention is in order of ta’aruf, but the point is that kind of relationship is haram (forbidden).
Then where and when is the prophet's guidance we are going to put / use ?????????
Hopefully this will adding the knowledge and will be the guidance in any problems.
Waallahua'lam
The Prophet’s Town 24safar1436H
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